Some years back, a student asked me how I ended up in Argentina. This is a question I never tire from answering as it allows me to recount my fair tale love story. This time, however, rather than focusing on how we met and how I followed my heart, the story had taken on a different tone. I told her of how I had thrown everything to the wind, how I had quit my job, bought a one way ticket and flew to Argentina to "oh so cliche-ly" see about a guy. This is what most would label as a "huge risk". I could have arrived with stars in my eyes only to meet my disillusion. He could have been a total freak, a drug addict, a rapist, a murderer or worse, MARRIED!
"Weren't you afraid of failing?" she asked me.
Actually, I wasn't. Not only had the thought of failure never crossed my mind but I had rarely found myself feeling afraid of anything. I had always supposed this was one of the filters I simply didn't develop as a child. But as we continued delving deeper into this idea of fear of failure, I realized that it had nothing to do with filters. It is that I simply do not believe failure is real.
Failure is the illusion your fear instills in you. It is merely a different outcome to that which you had imagined or hoped for.
By definition, it is to be unsuccessful in achieving one's goal, But what if, in not achieving your goals, you learn and are then presented with new opportunities, can it then be deemed failure?
When we recognize that failure is not an option because it doesn't in fact exist, our fear withers and dissipates, opening the door to a world of unfiltered experiences rich in learning.
What are you afraid of? How are those fears defining your illusion of failure? Are you ready to let them go? Redefine your definitions.